Self-Love in the Workplace

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It may seem the word love and work in the same sentence is an oxymoron.   Most of us just see work as a series of laborious tasks or outputs,  for a desired outcome or achievement of cash. We rarely see our working life as the sort of passionate love affair?  If i’m honest, most of my real inner work has been mirrored in the workplace and some of my greatest mastery of self and spiritual growth has been achieved right there in the office.  It is possible we are missing out on the greatest teacher we take for granted. There is so much we can learn from our daily grind.

Exploring the concept of self-love is a good start.   The unhealthy version, is the narcissistic egomaniac focused on goals not people. You know the one.  Hopefully its not your manager. Theres one in every workplace. Just itching for that promotion. At any cost and more willing to do the overtime and happy with no work/life balance.   Always self-promoting and proclaiming the goods and often never delivering. Waiting in the wings to pounce on that next opportunity when the team is vulnerable. At any cost.   Its difficult not to be a predator in the workplace these days, as most of us are trying to survive the larger workloads and extra stress the changing economy brings us. Who wouldn’t want to be doing less with more pay?

In this insecure marketplace, everyone is out for themselves a little more.  This unhealthy, always in competition with your team mates and always being a ‘yes’ person to your boss. Can be damaging to your self-esteem. May even cause depression.  This fear based management style,  doesn’t always create high efficiency, achieving challenging goals for clients or reach excellence in reputation as a business.    It causes people to be anxious or over-confidence for show.  This is not real self-esteem. Just a mask for insecurity as most of us doubt our ability to deliver or perform deep down.   Its amazing how often managers reward the bravado rather than the real employees being honest and quietly confident  in a rapidly changing environment with more demands and less time to enjoy the rewards of achievement.

Exploring this concept of self-love in the workplace has never been more important. Most workplaces are wrecking havoc on self-esteem.   What does healthy self-esteem look like?   Some examples could be:

  • An ability to bounce back after failure without self-hating
  • More positivity when overcoming obstacles
  • Higher ability to manage a changing environment
  • More confidence to reach difficult goals  with limited resources

These traits will become even more important as the world economy changes and workplaces face more challenges  and issues with people and teams to achieve productivity levels.   Managers would do well to work on encouraging healthy self-esteem in their workers, rather than using fear-based motivational strategies.  This would achieve high productivity and team engagement.  Likely result could be, winning more business and less costly turnover.

The following ways you can boost your self-love and promote more self-esteem in the workplace.  The following examples are how you can practice more loving ways towards yourself at work:

  • After work everyday, even if it is for 20 minutes, do something that you are passionate about. Cooking a great meal, gardening, going to a yoga/dance/art class, listen to music, play the guitar, learn meditation, having a beverage with a mate, spending quality times with kids/loved ones.
  • Keep a list of work-related achievements every week on a Friday afternoon for example and do something to celebrate these wins.
  • Create a self-esteem bulletin board, every month write down tangible evidence of your value, what project did you do a good job on, when did someone praise your efforts, or any of your childrens/loved ones achievements you helped with and write this down where you can see it everyday
  • When you see yourself negative self-talking, make a conscious choice to stop this negative thinking and focus on how to solve the problems and even have a ‘stop’ sign near by as a physical reminder
  • Plan a trip or something nice in the future to look forward to, a reward for your hard work and efforts you put in daily to live your dream.
  • Take criticism as an opportunity for growth and learning rather than taking it personally as we all have areas to improve on and having feedback is a good thing
  • If you are not getting enough appreciation and want more feedback on the things you are doing well. Ask for it and possibly get this in writing from clients or customers.

Further to exploring self-love, is the importance of health and safety in most workplaces today includes both mental and physical protection.  When we have a healthy self-esteem, we can manage depression and other mental health conditions that can sometimes be brought about by stress.

As a worker/employee we must take responsibility for own own health and safety at work and start to ask the self-loving questions such as; do I need a few days off as I can feel burnout symptoms coming on.  Do I need to stop working weekends and focus on my relationship? Do I need a break from that repetitive task if a small back strain has occurred? Do I need to do more strength building exercise such as yoga/Pilates to be better at work?

People matter just as much as processes and procedures to ensure a safe and happy work environment is achieved, see quote below:

Safety Helmet is required but
Positive Thoughts are important
Safety Goggles are required but
Conscious Vision is important
Safety Hand Gloves are required but
Righteous Protective Action is important
Safety Shoes are required but
Quick and Safe Steps are important

http://www.citehr.com/330909-safety-poem-positive-thoughts.html#ixzz37tpXEb56

All in all, it is the simple awareness that we do matter and we are not robotic humans that go to work and just do it.  You need to believe that you are worthy of so much love for yourself. That you take responsibility and ensure you have what you need at work and ask for the appreciation.  We are thinking and feeling creatures of habit and what we feed ourselves in our experiences day to day is our reality in the now and inevitably is who we become.

Sometimes this means that we realise our job is not good for us and we need to move on.  Or other times, we need to have more gratitude for what we do have.  Or maybe, we just need to train others in how to treat us a little better at work and set healthy boundaries. Either way, your working life is an opportunity for self-exploration and observe this every moment.   This attitude can only bring you more happiness and healthy self-esteem all-round.  This will bring more meaning into your working life. Whatever job/career/position you hold.  The unification of your spirit and inner world in your workplace is spiritual teachings you get paid for.

*Happy travels at Work in Exploring more ways to Love you*

Written by: Tamara Critch

“Career direction / Work related healing sessions are available including writing your CV, preparing you for a new position or helping you to cope better at work due to stress / anxiety including massage therapy, counselling and energy clearing body work”

Modern Day Slavery

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Overworked and Underpaid

Nobody wants to talk about this uncomfortable topic.  Where  good workers keep jobs and get promotions due to working thousands of hours unpaid overtime.  Perhaps some with lengthy careers have done years of free labour.

Welcome to the modern day age of workplace enslavement.   where did we go wrong in our sophistication to go far off living the dream?

slavery

It seems over time, its becoming less and less possible to stand up for our rights even with industrial relations support. With less jobs available and more economic down turns. Asking for time in lieu or negotiating more time / resources to complete high volume workloads is out of the question.  As this is seen to show incompetence.  As well as  plenty of other people lined up to take your place out there in the cold.

This modern world seems to offer promise of great careers with ambition and progress into potential higher paid positions.  so we can see overtime may be worth it?  After all we see management doing less and being paid more for the privilege.  These false aspirations to achieve these limited positions;  plant seeds of discontent.  left to work to survive / pay the bills; rather than future rewards. Some of us are lucky enough to gain employment after redundancy with a pay cut and more responsibility.

In saying this, there is no shame in participating fully at work and aspiring to be the best you can be.   its just that the workplace system can not provide movement up the heir-achy for everyone. Plus most positions now are subjected to  the clause “expected overtime” is part of your salary.  We sign up because its better than unemployment. Do we have a choice?

There also may be other factors at play here that has propelled us into these state of affairs.

Some possible theories:

  • Fluoride in the water calcifies our pineal gland so we are unable to think for ourselves and/or
  • The constant use of social media to uphold a collective illusionary image rather than just being real and/or
  • Consuming preservatives, chemicals and processed food due to being time poor and/or
  • Overindulging in easy access substances such as cigarettes,  alcohol, chocolate, sugar etc to escape or relax from a difficult day and/or
  • Watching brain numbing television programs positioned as entertainment rather than mindless consumption programming us to think: and/or
  • Taking the prescription pharmaceutical drugs your doctor recommends to help you cope and keep your job.

In light of the above.  May this be a little inspiration for you to think more seriously about taking back your power at work.  Being your health and wellbeing mostly. We all need to work on improving energy levels and not taking our body for granted. when we are healthy we can then think more clearly and make better choices and decisions. This helps work and life.  I would recommend detoxing the mind and body to change things for the better. Live more healthy and be more self-loving towards ourselves.   work life is a reflection of your home life. And vice versa.

pure potential

Ideas to change your current employee status quo: 

  •  Be your own boss and try self-employment.  At least you can prepare for this whilst you have your full-time job
  • Start to apply for another job that pays better and you can set more healthy boundaries in the beginning.
  • Perhaps unemployment appears attractive at this point in time and you can start to under perform on purpose
  • Travelling overseas can always give way to a new perspective and pack up your life and move to an exotic land for a while

enslaved

The grass may appear greener some where else. This is human nature.  On occasion, we may do something drastically different to escape the present situation, and the same issues  are certain to return with some added extras.  Facing our problems and recovering is better than escaping and pushing it away.

The only way out of enslavement,is taking back control of your mind and to practice thinking differently; more positively with ease towards ourselves.   We may train ourselves in meditation to observe our surroundings and inside us more. Or we can change our attitude to see experiences as opportunities for personal growth.   For example;  so many people are under-utilitised and over-qualified for the job they currently do.  This may teach us about humility, learning not to be a ‘know it all’ and disengage from ego/power struggles.  There are a myriad of ways to think about this. May you have another one?

When we know we choose how we think about something that happens.  We can move out of our modern day enslavery in the workplace and life in general. Then gracefully jump into a liberated state of being and a life full of promise with more joy.

infinity

May we consider changing perspectives a little.  There are infinite ways to see any experience and situation. We forget this sometimes and can only see the one someone else provides.  How about experimenting and seeing at least two more ways to think about an incident at work?  This helps us to see how our work is just another playground; a smorgasbord for human experience.  Helping us to participate more active and alive at work; and maybe doing somethings different too.  maybe that will lead to a promotion.

It is important to follow process/protocol, and also add some of your own flair and creativity into the mix and know this is available.  So many people are doing more than one position, so if you have some shortcuts and think outside the box. Start to use these ideas in a smart cooperative way.

I invite you to take on all lessons your job can provide; whether its;about  ego, control, power, commitment, direction and stamina. where else will you learn these?  These are important lessons that can spill into our personal lives also to potentially improve relationships and wellbeing.

Also, the money story need not be at the forefront of your mind either. Most of the time people earning $30K more than you, get taxed higher and it equals out.  I encourage you see yourself working for your own reasons and dreams.  This will show you there is no difference working for free or otherwise. Money is an illusion and having more of it, may not necessarily make the things you think; easier.

Work your path for your own purpose not somebody else’s.  You  can then shift your place into a more empowered stance. More able to gently assert your boundaries and be happier at work.

Live on Purpose; Walk your Potential!!!

Written by Tamara Critch – Career Coach 

Let Go; Be Happy

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It can be a real contradiction to ask someone to let it go at work and be happy. We are trained to believe, in order to stay in employment, we better not drop the ball.   The next steps after than is being prepared to do overtime to meet excruciating time constraints and encouragement to exceed key performance indicators.

How many of us at work do or be things that are against ourselves and how can this lead to happiness? How do we keep our job and still be who we are; rather than being at the mercy of the whimsical needs of others?

Sometimes its a blessing not to be paid that well.   Less chance of being in a perpetual state of tension just to prove your worth to the business. How can this make any person happy? This is not freedom; this is a fear based living .

Remember why you are at work, it is more than just for the money?  Humans need a greater sense of purpose. If we allow ourselves to let go of the ‘have to’s”, we can then sharpen our senses  to have what we really want. The work or job we do, needs to bean an enjoyable component to your life as a whole.

Letting go of the reward complex set by others is essential to this process. When we are happy we are naturally more productive and get on better with colleagues/clients/co-workers to keep that job. It is in our own best interest to do work on ‘our own’ terms.

This is especially difficult, just starting a job or working towards a promotion. As we are assessed on our ability to comply with rules/regulations/standards set by others in order to gain something we want. Have you let go enough lately to allow yourself to think ” what is it I actually really want?”. It might be something you least expect.

“Be strong enough to let go and be patient enough to get what you deserve”

What sets us apart of the rest;  to move into real success is our own inner intrinsic motivators. External motivators get us very little in the long run.  Having others; like management; set the bar to too high or too low can be a key reason for unhappiness at work. The collective need to left go of the ‘top dog’ attitude and always being right, can then cultivate more inner peace at work. People can reach pure potential that way.

intimidation

We have the power to choose how we feel every minute of the day. We choose how to behave in a situation, how to react and how we conduct ourselves at work. This is a lot of control we actually do have if we can see it. Letting go of the pressures of things outside our control and start focusing on what can be done leads to true happiness at work. Set your own key happiness indicators. Nobody can make us feel anything unless we want them to.

A big part of the letting go process at work can be simply being grateful for having this job/role/position. Then we can listen to the lessons and observe the experiences this brings to your life. Observing what others have to teach you is an excellent tool for your own personal growth and this is something money can never buy.

Jobs come and go. Redundancies are on the rise and chunks of time jobless is happening more and more often; with this insecure economic landscape. This doesn’t mean you need to feel insecure. its about trusting yourself that you can always provide and have optimism about the next employment adventure with an open mind. Letting go of the need to control or progress or have the same career tomorrow. This, clinging to the need to keep your job or wanting that job only leads to unhappiness.

Take back your own mind and see the reality is what it is, not as you would like it to be.  Be confident to bring something to your managers attention or put forward a good idea about improvements. Wasting these opportunities for change to make a difference is the difference between achieving empowered employment.

Letting go is not about escaping reality; its about facing situations to help things to change for the greater good at work. This leads to higher work productivity rather than doing things for your own protection or personal gain/agendas . Perpetuating the status quo even when a work process is clearly not working or a colleague is making it difficult for you. its time to let go and speak up, feel the experience and move forward into healthier territories at work.

If you lose your job because of it. Its worth it.

This the the Art of Happiness at work.

Written by Tamara Critch, a Wellness@Work Coach, guiding you to a happier work situation and can assist you with finding a new job offering a personalised service including CV writing and application preparation that will get you that interview every time. Tamara also teaches and runs at home meditation classes/events and a mobile massage therapy service to help you detox from your work stressors. Please enquire: tam_critch@yahoo.com.au or call 0409375859.

A Changing World

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We are living in a dynamic world never seen before.  How do we adapt to change without creating fear, stress and anxiety within?  The more we experience loss, the more we tend to believe we may go through that again. In essence the thought of things is worse than the actual event.

The solution is mindfulness. What this means is not being attached to craving about what you want to happen or what you don’t want to happen. Being happy with things as they are, not as you would like them to be.

Personally, I have had many breakups and redundancies to know that nothing is certain. Even if you do make the effort, try your best and love/give more than you are able. It still doesn’t mean those things you hold dear in your life right now will still be around in the future. The future does no exist. It is only now we can have certainty, for a split second of a awareness of a moment.

We say that; gone are the days where you stay in a job for 20 years and wait for retirement. The young people coming up through today’s world will have 5 career changes by the time they experience 30 years of age.

Being happy with what is around you right now is the most important aspect of mindfulness. This helps to combat fear and anxiety that surrounds the trepidation of things being different than expected.

Just being happy with having a roof over your head will see that you get a great job afterwards. Or start meeting new people. When we are happy with the smallest morsel of food, we then tend to see abundance coming in so thick and fast.

The real answer to adapting to change is not having expectations about how things will or won’t be. To kick those nasty thoughts and fears; practicing mindfulness without passionate desire for things that probably won’t happen or may not come your way. Maybe its just because you want it too much? Perhaps, you are lazy and see how much work or effort changing the status quo for the possibility to be happy and not knowing for sure. The natural order of things is balance. Being greedy or hungry for receiving an experience when you are already provided for or have had plenty to eat already.

This is how the universe works. This is how Mother Earth teaches us. That we can’t have our own way all the time and suck everything dry. When we don’t get our own way, this is a great teacher and helps us grow into more gratuitous beings. More mindful, in control and making a happy destiny happen

Welcome Change in your LIFE!

Written by Tamara Critch, who is a Wellness & Work Coach, with counselling expertise and a bodyworker, raw food nutritionist and gut health therapist.  if you would like to book in for Skype sessions, please add tam_critch and make an appointment online for a very value packed affordable price. Otherwise, face to face appointments are also available including mobile massage therapy. Tamara also teaches and runs meditation classes for individuals/groups that focus on dreaming and sound healing for relaxation and empowerment.